Rocky update

So this morning, I hit the balcony - every time I think to head out there now, I can't but help think that I'll find him (Rocky) sleeping in the corner. Well, no sign (in every sense of that word) of him this morning , but then I noticed something completely weird and ugly on the railing. God it was gross. Of course, completely slimy - though I didn't dare touch it - little pieces of which were scattered all along the railing, with weird tiny bugs feasting on whatever it was. Upon closer inspection it appeared to be a rotten green pepper. I do not want to know what the orange slime was on it. Come on you raccoons - what's the DEAL. Go be disgusting somewhere else. Preferably at ground level. Preferably underground.
That varmint better not show his face 'round these parts anymore.

Monday afternoon smells

Was out the back balcony sunbathing and noticed a weird zooey, slash, local park kind of smell. Kind of like hot urine. Then I thought, better check behind that tarp where Brons bike is stored (I seem to have a history of smelling weird things and just knowing what to lift or move in order to locate the offense). Cut to lifting the tarp: theres a raccoon sleeping underneath. I lifted up the tarp a few times subsequent and we made eye contact. Once when I lifted the tarp, I caught him mid-yawn! Oh my god cutest thing of the day. But also stenchiest. And strange and very jarring.

Q and A

Conversation with me and Auntie

Auntie: I keep thinking about this so I have to ask. In your last e-mail you talked about __ and __ and you said that they smell like old people. How do old people smell?

Me: Hahah you keep thinking about it - either they smell like old weird musky cologne/perfume or they smell like medical supplies and medications and stuff. I think people who are on medication probably start to have it seeping out of their pores or something. Next time you are around someone old, take note. Or sometimes they also smell like bad breath or unwashed clothes. You get the point.